Where Do I Get My Grenades At?

Last year in novel, my teacher (we'll call him Ari) had us rewrite the lyrics of I AM WOMAN by Helen Reddy and Ray Burton to accomodate for the bogans of the world. We all had good fun, so this is what I produced.

I'm a bogan watch me gore
We drink in packs of four of more
And I know fuck all so I guess I can't pretend
'cause you've bitched it all before
When I throw up on the floor
And I can't be stuffed to clean that shit up again

CHORUS

Oh yes, I am wide
And it's cracksores all again
Yes, I skipped the price
But look at the weight that I just gained
If I feel like it, I won't do anything
I am bum (bum)
I am unbearable (unbearable)
I am bogan

You can slap and kick me down
'cause it's what everybody wants
More determined to demolish me dingy hole
And I come back smelling pongier
Not a genius any longer
'cause you've doubled me conviction for assault

CHORUS

I am bogan hear me groan
See me stand up for the court
Cos I threw me outstretched hands around your neck
But I'm still a fat yobbo
With a fat arsed way to go
Until I make my first parole

Oh yes, I am wide
And it's cracksores all again
Yes, I skipped the price
But look at the weight I just gained
If I feel like it, I won't do anything
I am bum (bum)
I am unbearable (unbearable)
I am bogan
Oh, I am bogan
I am unbearable
I am bum

REPEAT FINAL LINES AND FADE