Needy, Ears and Dignity

This week in short story, my good teacher who I shall call Maria (How do you solve a problem like Maria?) had us talking about love. Apparently it is our theme for our next short stories, and I'm pretty confident that I'll get mine right. Anywho, she had us write out these little practises, and she thought mine was funny, yet it did not follow the guidlines of the assignment. Enjoy.

Needy coughed, 'They always take me for granted! Stuck up bastards!'

'Don't let it get you down,' answered Ears.

'No, those wankers... all of them... think that I just expect to be ignored. Nah, not happening anymore mate.'

'What're you gonna do about it?' Ears asked with as much enthusiasm to rival a teapot.

'You know what,' said Needy. 'I don't think I'll do anything.'

'Really.'

'That's right. Let those ungrateful idiots suffer without my divine guidence.'

'So you're basically letting 'em burn in hell... and you're gonna watch.'

'Exactly,' Needy answered, producing a cheesy smile.

'Well, sounds like you're set, mate.'

'I certainly am. Maybe, I'll even have some spare time now. A lot of spare time.'

'You gonna write that award winning novel you tell your mum about?'

'That's right. A lot of free time.'

'Wonderful.'

'Hey, you wanna come out tonight? Celebrate my success,' Needy suggested, admiring himself in the nearest reflection.

'No thanks. I've got a date tonight.'

'Oooh, with who? Anyone I know?'

'You used too. Their name's dignity.'

'Oh... my... God,' Needy gasped. 'You're going out with a guy.'

His eyes lit up before sticking his head out the window. 'Ears is dating a guy!' Needy proclaimed to the streets.

'Yes, that's right,' Ears answered. 'You must feel so proud for learning such a thing.' Needy continued to call out to the streets, and Ears left the room, locking him in.